Chapter One: Just Your Average Weekend

My old man didn’t bring his house key with him to work while on his night shift between Friday and Saturday. I woke at 6 or so on Saturday morning and, finding myself unsatisfied with my amount of sleep, went for a piss and decided to return to bed. That’s when I heard it. The knock. Instantly I knew of course who it was. My mom got out of bed and was down the stairs before I could finish urinating. I went back to bed and was met with unremembered dreams.

When my body was satisfied with my amount of sleep I descended the stairs and had my first cups of coffee (I drink far too much). Mom asked me to help bathe one of our cats, Miss Mew, who was formerly owned by my uncle Mike, and also had to live with being called Kid Kaht (yes, spelled like that) and Palomino (for some reason). Apparently the cat, thick furred, had so much feces clinging to her rear that she could not defecate any more. So sayeth mother, so it must be the accepted reality, even if it sounds wrong.

I cut a deal with the devil. Hey mom, I’ll call for work if you try this show I like (The Expanse). We had started the new Netflix Lost In Space the night before and found it to be thoroughly watchable. I got a shift for Monday at 2pm. It’s strange to me that they do not have as much work as they used to. At least they didn’t ask me to go to the fucking airport again to go play violent brute or terrorist with the metal detectors. I have plans Wednesday to get my resume tightened up and my ass applied to the remaining dozen or so jobs in my queue. Thursday my girlfriend wants to do something during the day and at night the guys are coming after a concert. I have made a further plan to go see Infinity War on Thursday at 7 in the shitbox theater in Aylmer. The popcorn is always stale, the seats are uncomfortable, and the ease of sneaking people in is laughable – not that I’ve actually tried, which is surprising.

Mom didn’t care for the first episode of the Expanse. No sooner did I deny doing a rewatch of the MCU to a friend did mom ask to do one. So we started with Iron Man (which I saw in theaters; mom has never seen), then skipped The Incredible Hulk (Mom doesn’t like Edward Norton). Iron Man 2 gave us troubles about half way in (shame about all the reliable streams disappearing) so we jumped into Thor, then Captain America, and then The Avengers to finish of the night.

Iron Man still holds up as a solid action comedy. It’s cool seeing how some things, like cinematography, seem so 2008 (soTwoThousandAndLate amirite) and would be updated in the wider universe. RDJ is stellar casting. At the time I thought he would have been amazing as Doctor Strange as well, though Benedict Cumberbatch (to be referenced by puns from here on out) it really good. It’s mindblowing to know that something like the MCU as an entity hinged on this movie taking off and setting the standard for the flicks to come.

Thor had mom doing knee slaps with the slapstick comedy. I agree with her assessment of the humour. I am totally not a robot. beepbooboobeep. In a way similar to Black Panther from earlier this year, I was enthralled with the Asgard portions of the film and how Brannagh makes them feel thoroughly like a science-fantasy world separate from Midgard. Tom Hiddleston is great in this and later in the Avengers, but it’s not until what I would argue is the weakest of the MCU that his character gets some growth. The ending of Thor gave me, as we millennials say, “da feelz”.

Captain America: The First Avenger is a movie strengthened by The Winter Soldier and Civil War because up until those two movies I didn’t really get Captain America/Steve Rogers in the same way I still don’t get Superman/Kal El/Clark Kent. After the Russos got me on Team Cap, The First Avenger shows the traits in which Captain America is to be admired: old world traits of moral uprightness, self sacrifice, and well placed tenacity to do what you believe is right. And that’s before Chris Evans’ workout routine is shown off. Steve is that lanky kid from Brooklyn at heart and remains that way even when he’s liberating Hydra Prison Camps. Side note, and spoilers for CATFA: how could SHIELD be so reckless and use a game recorded while Steve was alive, living in Brooklyn? I cannot be more careful as a creator of fiction than a group who perfect lying for a living, can I?

The Avengers is The Avengers. I find the jokes land and I find the action, especially the team up shots, to be great spectacles. As a fan of character pieces, I don’t particularly care for the movie on a plot level, but it’s definitely enjoyable. I got Mom hooked on Agents of SHIELD last summer, so this stroll down Coulson lane has been really interesting since I never really noticed him in the movies before.

I decided to take a shower before bed because I had spent the day in my super warm Vader PJs and the house was inordinately hot, so I was sticky and gross. Only after did I charge my phone and check my texts. Girlfriend went to bed maybe an hour before. I have to admit, as bad as it sounds, letting my phone die like that and severing communication with EVERYONE is liberating. I haven’t done that since I went away on vacation for two weeks in a foreign country with no wi-fi access and just left the phone completely off.

Saturday was overall a good day. I think that bargaining with myself to call work might be a step to getting shit done for them. If I call for hours now, then I can do this to relax. The BattleTech game is coming out Tuesday, which is exciting. I’ve already set up my MechWarrior’s backstory and might even write a fan fic about him, maybe even posted on here.


The plan for Sunday was some yard work, some shopping (shoes, for work, because fuck my life), and to continue the MCU marathon (Phase IIa: Iron Man 3, The Dark World, The Winter Soldier) while working on laundry. Mom unfortunately came down with a flu over night and passed out early into the third movie. We did not go shopping. I finished The Winter Soldier on my own.

Iron Man 3 isn’t that bad of a movie. It has problems but I think everyone hates the twist. I think Ben Kingsley is great in the movie, so I don’t mind. The villain is a bit bland.

Thor: The Dark world is pretty boring but Loki is entertaining, as usual. The relationship between Thor, Loki, and Odin really makes the movie have great moments. Shame Christopher Eccleston is wasted in this movie as Malekith.

The Winter Soldier remains my favourite film in the MCU. It’s a tense spy flick with great action set pieces, and The Winter Soldier has a weighty presence to him. I think the highway fight stands out most. It’s nice to see Black Widow get a bit of characterization. Falcon is a good addition to Team Cap too. The opening scene stands out as a great early relationship builder between the two characters. There are a lot of emotional turns throughout the film. This is the movie that made me like Cap as a character, one who would eventually be my favourite. It might be because this is one of the best tries at a Metal Gear Solid movie ever (infiltrating the boat, elevator fight, CQC fight with the enemy, unexpected ties to that enemy, fucking around with key card thingies to disable a super weapon, SHIELD and Hydra resembling the Patriots in a way. The Winter Soldier also fights like Vamp or Raiden. Any time I see the knife fight in the highway scene, I say in my head “Ah, I see you are also a scout”).

Continued listening to Critical Role Campaign 2, episode 15 and played a little Beat Cop by 11 Bit Studios while waiting for Westworld at 9. The problem with Westworld is, as engrossing as it is, I got distracted while putzing on my computer and I’ll need to rewatch it. Probably tomorrow before work.

Ultimately Sunday was pretty dull overall. I predict complaining and headaches in my next post. Let’s see if I’m clairvoyant.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s